This morning Aaron and the two older boys went to a homeless breakfast and cooked bacon for them. I didn't go. I never go because I usually feel like I'm wandering around trying to take care of my kids rather than doing anything really useful. If I was talking to Aaron about this, he would now be giving me a speech about how I should just not worry about the kids and how I am useful just by being there, etc., etc., etc. Well, he's probably right, but I still don't want to go. I'd rather be at home and take a nap. This is not a politically correct feeling. It's not even very Christian when you come right down to it. But it is an honest feeling and that's about all I can muster up right now. I don't mind that Aaron goes. Now, there was a time that he went and it resulted in a homeless couple living in our basement for three weeks, which was quite an adventure. But mostly, I'm glad he does it, apart from the fact that he returns smelling like breakfast foods for the rest of the day.
Aaron has a gift for being able to talk to people. Mostly he just manages to think of really good and/or strange questions to ask people that gets them talking, and then he listens really well, which is all most people really want. I don't share that gift. I can listen fairly well, especially because I am shy of saying a lot to people I don't know. But I can never think of questions to ask. Not good ones. I can think of the obvious ones, but not interesting ones that make people just light up. I'm more of an observer and interpreter. I listen and watch and try to translate what I see into an overall impression. This leads to odd conversations with Aaron where I say something like, "I got the feeling that.....blah blah blah." And he will ask,"Why do you say that?" And then I have to somehow convey the feeling that I had from a person when they said whatever they said. This also happened once with a friend in high school. She wanted to date this guy, but I knew that she shouldn't. When she asked why, I couldn't tell her exactly because it was a general impression I had of him. I couldn't say, "Oh, well, he killed a man," or anything like that. So, she went out with him. And then she figured out why I told her not to. Needless to say, they are not still together.
Honestly, I am not sure what the point of this blog has been. I really didn't know what to write when I sat down here, and all of that is just what came to mind. So, I guess you've just had a window into the world of Tammy.